1979. I’d already been exposed to the cultural virus that is Star Wars and had seen Battle of the Planets and Starship Yamato and Far Out Space Nuts– but nothing could prepare a young person of the 70’s for the dribble if urine from the void that is JASON OF STAR COMMAND. Part of the financial drive to make kids shows with real people rather than the far to expensive cartoons of earlier decades (ala Kroft Supershow and it’s ilk), JASON OF STAR COMMAND starts with the worst robot you’ve ever seen before and then digresses into a rather complex plot about body doubles and for an 8 year old, abject confusion. Since this was a plotline that should have NOT been attempted before any character development had taken place so we (the 8 year old audience) could actually tell the evil doubles before the characters in the show could rather than just wondering what the heck is going on and hoping some stuff blows up (like the Wiki robot or, best yet, the clothes off Susan O’Hanlon).
Well, this fucking show is on Netflix now and if I could I would force you to watch it to share that little piece of my childhood that died drowning in astral urine and to know for certain when I talk about failed MOO clones or the people complaining about the Mass Effect ending and deem them all sorts of sprays of SPACE PISS, I’m channeling JASON OF STAR COMMAND into your open mouth.
And speaking of the 70’s, look at this holy shit piece of plastic for the rich kids: